Freedom is such a lonely word.

by Klairewind

Who would’ve guessed… right?

Just when i was whining about my limitations, freedom just showed itself right at my doorstep… so, ok —  now what? i just realized, it’s not as easy as i thought it was.

These are the times when i wish you were still here.

These are the times when i wish i didn’t wish for this.

These are the times when i wish i was having fun with you.

These are the times when i wish i was just enjoying my day seeing you smile.

These are the times when i wish stupid tears wont flow from my pudgy eyes from missing you.

These are the times when i wish… i just wish… you didn’t have to leave.

I could never look at this house the same way as i did before.. you left me with so many memories in this place that i couldn’t stand being alone in here sometimes… not really sometimes because its more like MOST of the time.  Everywhere i look, i remember you. i remember seeing you there, i remember you hugging me. i remember how you would sometimes look at me when i’m busy or just pretending to be busy then you would sometimes tell jokes just to distract me then kiss me unexpectedly. i remember us just sitting on the sofa, on this computer chair, at the porch, at our “special area”… it never fails to drive me wild and just move me to tears…


i guess i have to move on.. someday. but right now i’m still savoring the bittersweet memories of what used to be. i’d still want for you to come back though.. if after the clouds in your head have dissipated and you’d still want to be with me that is…

i hate having to be on a replay button. this time i want to set things right.