The Shower Chronicles: Journey To The Center of The Chrysalis

It has always been in the shower — ideas rushing in as the water gushes out and drench my body so does the stream of thoughts interlacing one from the other.

And so here it is, I figure i should probably write down all (well i wont probably wont get to do this all the time but will try to do it as often) that has been going through my mind in the shower unto “paper”.


Life is like the life cycle of a butterfly. We are all born individually and yet dependently on the environment that holds us.

Caterpillars emerge from a single tiny shell — as soon as they are born, their only reason for living is to feed off the tree or bush that they are born to. They are exposed to the dangers of the environment like the rain and the predators that might try to disrupt their peaceful life of munching away single leaf that they could see. Some bushes may actually be overpopulated with caterpillars and so everybody struggles to get their own share. Some will not make it, either because they have lost the race for food or they die at the mercy of the predators no matter how much they try to protect themselves with those stink rays to ward them off or simply they just succumb to the elements… Such is a life of a caterpillar: EAT OR DIE. DEFEND OR DIE.

I think humans are quite the same — we struggle to live. Everybody thinks that life has to be a rat race where everybody needs to one up and compete with everybody else. People endlessly just consume things mindlessly without considering anybody else (Well except for family and friends of course, but then some don’t really even care about that. Really.) People struggle with their jobs, their relationships, their homes.. almost anything really. When something goes wrong, they wallow in the drama of things instead of getting their selves fixed up altogether. Sometimes the elements aren’t even kind to people — things are being swept away with fire and ice along with the winds that literally changes everything. What’s left of these people when they are all stark out of hope? Well some choose to blame other things other than themselves. When they’re struck down and have even bared their soul, some end up being bitter blaming everything around them other than themselves and the things that have happened along the way. While some choose to call out to a deity that they believe would give them everything that they want like a genie in a lamp.

“3 wishes… you only get three wishes..” oh crap, can i wish for more wishes?

No. That’s cheating.

And so then the journey of the butterfly winds up in a cocoon. They tuck themselves away, spinning their own saliva to form a chrysalis. A soft casing at first… a very delicate process to put all effort in and consider. There shall be no spot missed, everything that they are should be shrouded within. Then it hardens and all the life they had lived is turned inside-out. It’s like they have journeyed back into the womb of their shell, only the shell is different and it is of their own making. That’s where the magic happens — a change that the human eye cannot see, but only the caterpillar can feel happen. Life does not stop inside the chrysalis — it is where it begins!

I don’t think many people try to look at themselves, I mean REALLY look at themselves. Sure they might look at themselves in the mirror and admire their physique. But that’s all that there is, admiring the physique. Some may even chose to loathe themselves if they don’t like what they see in the mirror. And yes the drama begins again like a broken record stuck on replay.   If it’s not the physique, it would be the worldly accomplishments like a great job that pays 5-7 digits, acquisitions of the latest technological advancement (which some wouldn’t be so content of having, replacing them ever so often as the latest model comes out [such a waste, I know right!]), titles that they think define the very core of their being which makes them feel so big and indestructible… the list goes on and on. It all goes back to the ego. THE NEVER ENDING SCREAMING EGO. Everything that people think holds their life in place all comes back to the ego. Take away all of that, what’s left? What are you? What’s behind that mask you’re wearing? Everything is an illusion.

“Why are you wearing that silly bunny suit?”

“Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?”

(excerpts from Donnie Darko)

In one in a billion of the world’s population, who has ever bothered to look inside? I mean really look at THE inside of themselves?  Peering inside is not even half of the battle, one must make that journey inside. Embracing both the good and the bad. One must get lost inside in order to find themselves inside. People struggle for the change in the world yet never looking to change themselves. Change is an inside job as true happiness is an inside job. Not many people are strong enough like the caterpillar to journey into the center of their own cocoons. They are afraid to learn, to see, and to feel themselves because it’s much more easier to perceive everything that is outside of themselves, everything they think they could grab a hold of and control. The exterior ghost of a shell holds more importance than the intelligent sentient being that resides in it.

“To get to the heart of everything, one must abandon what the world thinks and listen to the voice within.”

There will be times that what you hear on the inside will not be pleasant, but that is a part of you — something you cannot deny and MUST embrace, denying it is futile. It help shapes who you are. You may even discover things about yourself that you thought you were never capable of. To be friends with yourself is the most liberating thing in the world. Like the magic that works inside a caterpillars chrysalis, it is a process of rebirth and regeneration. When you have journeyed inside, your view of the outside world changes. You become more aware of everything: The World Around and The Divine Self — nothing was, is or has been separated from one another. With all the neuro-chemical changes that goes from the inside the chrysalis of our minds follows the changes that we could see outside. Change cannot happen overnight, it is a constant process. We breathe in and dive inside the waters of our emotions and intellect. The changes we feel from the inside radiates through the outside, it will affect everything it touches — as long as you have stated your intention. Everything that you are to become is made aware, and how you affect to be the change around you happens.

“Sometimes you must show yourself as you really are. People who are lost in the struggle of existence have become prisoners of illusion. Just remember one thing: you are made of light, and when it is fitting, you may have to prove it.”

(excerpts from Buddha by Deepak Chopra)

And so i leave you with a question: “Do you wish to be a butterfly and soar high? Or do you wish to be a caterpillar and forever crawl and struggle?”

“Be the Change That You Want To See In The World. But For Heaven’s Sakes, Please Start With Your Own World! The Rest Will Follow.”