Unparalleled Parallel Worlds Collide

sometimes, things aren't what they seem

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So I took the road less traveled by-the journey of a Rebel ♥ 


It has been exactly one year when I had decided to leave home. 

I admit it wasn’t an easy thing to do at that point in time but then I’ve had enough of always trying to conform just to appease other people’s whims.

“So,  what about me? ” My inner voice said in retort.

***11:33***

I just took the plunge. I had less resources with me at that moment & was actually scared of what I was about to do. But then I did it. To hell with everything, I just wanted to be free!

Free to decide for myself. Free to express myself . Free to do whatever I’ve always wanted to do. Free to be me! 

So you think I won’t survive, didn’t you? 

The moment I left, it felt like a part of me just died and was reborn to be a stronger version of myself. 

Everything happened so fast. 

From zero to hero

It’s like the universe finally decided to give me my birthright. Opportunities opened up from the moment I decided to let go of my old life. New learnings, new friends and family, a fresh start… I couldn’t ask for more. I strayed from the drama that used to be me and viola!  Here I am now: happy, wiser, and empowered. 

So cheers to the people who used to make my life a mess. Without you I wouldn’t be able to understand my worth. 


I’ve lived my life like a masochist

Hearing my father say,

‘Told you so, told you so!

Why can’t you be like the other girls?’

I said, ‘Oh no, that’s not me

And I don’t think that it’ll ever be’

Thought I belonged to a different tribe
Walking alone, never satisfied, satisfied
Trying to fit in but it wasn’t me
I said, ‘Oh no, I want more
That’s not what I’m looking for’

So I took the road less traveled by
And I barely made it out alive
Through the darkness somehow I survived
Tough love, I knew it from the start
Deep down in the depth
Of my rebel heart

I’ve spent some time as a narcissist
Hearing the others say,
‘Look at you, look at you!
Trying to be so provocative’
I said, ‘Oh yeah, that was me’
All the things I did just to be seen

Outgrown my past and I’ve shed my skin
Letting it go and I’ll start again, start again
Never look back, it’s a waste of time
I said, ‘Oh yeah, this is me
And I’m right here where I wanna be’
I said, ‘Hell yeah, this is me
Right where I’m supposed to be’

So I took the road less traveled by
And I barely made it out alive
Through the darkness somehow I survived
Tough love, I knew it from the start
Deep down in my rebel heart

So I took the road less traveled by
And I barely made it out alive
Through the darkness somehow I survived
Tough love, I knew it from the start
Deep down in the depth

Of my rebel heart
Of my rebel heart
In my rebel heart

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unexpected


my draft for the second chapter was corrupted yesterday :/ just when I was about to finish everything, something unexpected happened 😦 I got part of the draft here on my blog but I guess I will have to rewrite most of the post T_T

Frifrildi Eda (p6) – The Beginning, The Tempest and The Dark


“Where am I? It’s so dark… and so cold… I can’t see, my eyes hurt… my body hurts…”

She lays crumpled on the ashen floor, battered and bruised. A moment ago she was with company, people whom she hold dear. Laughing, talking, and bickering at the dinner table, enjoying their meal… And then, it all happened so suddenly, with just one swoop. All she remembered was that lightning struck and a tempest had swept her away.

“Hello? are you still alive?” cried a small trembling voice.

“Who’s there? Who are you? What are you? …..Where am I?….” 

She fumbled through the questions non-stop. Her head reeling in from the pain and heart beating fast startled by the small voice that greeted her.

“We are… i don’t know, we are nowhere… I don’t know how i got here either.. I’m just a tiny caterpillar, i’m afraid i’m unable to help you right now, but i could at least keep you company…”

The Lady in the grey dress started to weep in a bitter tone.. she was all dazed and confused of what had come past. Trying to make sense of everything, she grasped desperately for her mind to still. Weeping was all that her body could muster to cope up with the moment.

The night was silent, there was nothing to be seen, no stars shone in the sky, not even a moon to shed light. The wind breezes in with an icy chill, the little caterpillar huddled close to the crumpled lady on the floor for warmth.

“I hope you don’t mind… I am but a tiny, little thing and I could not protect myself from the cold.”

The lady just laid there almost lifeless, exhausted, asleep and without a care. A faint whimper escapes her lips, as if in pain, as she cradles her knees closer to her chest.

“I guess she must be real tired… I guess her mind and her heart is tired.. I shall keep you company for a while. Insignificant as I am, this is all I could offer.”

The night goes on. Nothing to be seen only the icy wind howling through the eves.

Tired.


I’m tired of crying.

Be it something or for no reason at all.

I had been feeling depressed for days. And when i think i had shook it of by drowning myself with being around the friends whom i love, laughing and talking all day.. i still end up crying tons at night when i get home — and sometimes the crying pains get a lot more worse. 

I had been tracing the reason for my sadness. Oh hell, i tried watching a lot of movies, T.V. series and anime to keep my mind out of the melancholia, but then again, i still end up crying when the sappy scenes come up 😐 wtf, i even cried on the first two episodes of Walking Dead Season 1!! I’m so pathetic 😦

I probably do know the reason for this, but denying myself of it. Trying to reject that idea. But that idea haunts me. The hole’s been digging deeper in my chest every time i try to push it away– as if it’s been eroding. A part of me wants to reject it, a part of me wants to dig deeper. I want to know answers, but i’m too afraid to ask.. Afraid to know that what i had been thinking of IS really true. Afraid that all along, i was living in a lie created to protect me from getting hurt but had instead left me dead and disconnected, though unconsciously, by the one trying to protect me. I rather hear the truth than being lied too.. I don’t know what hurts the most: Being straight out slapped with the ugly truth or being tied up in a rosy string of lies.

Still, I’m a stubborn lass: I still stick with it even though it hurts. I made a promise, I intend to keep it. I am willing to drop everything that has been unconsciously seething inside just to know the truth of what had really been going on. I am not a fan of “what if’s”, i loathe that statements, I had been lured and bruised by those lines too many times.. It’s time I try to save my self from having to destroy. (And I don’t exactly know why I typed in “Destroy” but that’s a nice way of putting things i guess?)

This has to stop. Now. I’m tired! 

Under Construction :P


will eventually get around posting stuff soon 🙂 for the meantime, i’ll be fixing a few things XD